Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Gonna be a mama...like TOMORROW!

Tomorrow is the big day. "D" Day, if you will. We go into the hospital at 5:45 am. I am not so excited about that part but I guess it's better to get an early start. Delia should be here sometime tomorrow. I keep getting asked if I'm nervous...not really. Not because I'm a strong, level-headed, cool individual. More because at this point I don't know what to be nervous about. I'm sure tomorrow morning, I'll be a dribbling mess. Please keep us in your prayers. I know Mike's already nervous but excited. He just wants me and baby to be okay...and he is also semi-afraid he may pass out. Pray that he does not. We'll be ready for visitors Thursday evening, I'd say...so come on out and see the newborn. Just call Mike first. Obviously, I don't know what room we'll be in so Mike will keep everyone posted. It will be so nice to be able to do regular, ordinary things again too. Like shave my legs without cutting every inch of them because I can't really see what's going on. Or going back to only peeing three times every hour as opposed to 15 (Melissa knows what I speak of...my nickname should be "Tiny Bladder"...Elton John could write a song about it). Also, going back to regular jeans will be good, even if it's not right away. Well, I need to finish getting some last minute stuff done. Next time you all see me, I'll be someone's real, live mother!!!

Friday, November 23, 2007


Ok, been almost a month since my last post. Mainly because things have been crazy at home and work trying to prepare for Baby D. So crazy in fact, I've barely had a moment to actually remember that I'm going to be a mom soon. I mean, I know it's coming. This bump in my mid-section isn't here without reason. We're actually going to have her this Wednesday. I'm going in for an induction at 5:45 am. But I've actually been so busy, I haven't given myself a moment to stop and reflect on a lot of things here lately.

I have been a mess recently. Really. A walking mess. I have been a poor friend, a poor steward, a poor spouse even. I feel like I am so behind in my daily walk it's not even funny. I have tried to be too self-reliant (always a constant struggle with me...) and it has bitten me in the rear yet again. I feel like I have lost my grip because I was never supposed to be the one holding the reins to begin with.

I guess what I am most thankful for right now is a loving Father who takes me back everytime I fail. Everytime I am unfaithful to Him...He remains faithful in His love for me.

I want to lose the control I think I have over my life. I want to give it over. Desperately. I want to hand over my worries (and there are a lot) and leave it to my Father.

Please keep me and my family in your thoughts and prayers.